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Writer's pictureCharli

Wellness Matters 01.10.2021

Awakening Wisdom


As we begin to socialise again there will be the inevitable smalltalk starter:

A: So what is it you do?

B: Oh I work in IT and, you know, software...or, marketing/digital marketing/PR…

A: Yes but what do you actually do?


When I was a teacher and asked that question, my response was always: ‘I work with young people to help them develop a sense of the world, and their place in it.’


That often cut a conversation short, and the enquirer would look bemused and walk away, assuming they knew exactly what teachers really did.


On Wednesday, after a consultation with the lovely Rachael Wall ** about my sitting position when working, which is almost certainly the root cause of my neck and shoulder pain, I was asked to describe my approach to coaching.


In order to answer fully, I gave a very brief précis of my background as a leader and teacher, with over 30 years experience working with young people and families.


This prior experience is crucial to my approach to coaching.

David Clutterbuck refers to it as ‘mature coaching,’ which stems from the wide range of life and work experiences we accumulate along the way.


The process I employ is this:

  • We have a Discovery Discussion, which is free and lasts no more than 30 minutes. If there is a strong likelihood of a positive relationship building, we agree on an initial period of coaching.

  • Depending on your outcomes/personal journey so far, I might advocate 3 sessions, but sometimes 1 or 2 will suffice. However, if needed, we might arrange a chunk of up to 6 sessions, or more.

I never do a ‘hard sell’ - you agree to what you need.


So what actually happens in a session?

  • We swap pleasantries for a couple of minutes

  • I will ask: What is on your mind? And then I listen. That might be 5-10 minutes or it could be ½ hour. Much depends on your issue.

  • I will ask questions like: What is the problem here? Where are the challenges? Who else is affected by this? What would it look like if you achieve/don’t achieve your goal?

  • And What Else?

  • I pay very close attention to the subscript - there is always one - and usually where the real problem lies.


I am honest and can often recognise if there is an issue that requires attention, sometimes before it has been consciously realised by you.


  • I ask questions, I paraphrase and I summarise.

  • I challenge you to narrow your options so that your focus becomes clearer, which in turn means that your outcomes are achievable and realistic.

  • I always send follow up emails with the key points of our discussion, and this is also where I will draw your attention to any subscript you are internalising.

  • You might have tasks to complete which are designed to drive you towards your goals: refreshing your daily routine, reading, watching video clips, editing a CV or practicing interview answers.

I describe myself as an intuitive coach who is able to adapt to your needs, and this has been born out in my testimonials over the years (I might be new to being a sole trader, but I am not new to coaching).

I am a bit different, and that is good news for you, because I will walk beside you while you work towards reaching and achieving your goals.


Trust my process.


****October Offer**** Arrange 3 sessions 1-1 coaching and pay for 2 ****Until 31st October****


** while writing this my Sit Fit Plus cushion arrived and, honestly, I already feel the benefit of an improved posture! Thank you Rachael.



The heron represents peace, independence and the awakening to wisdom. Herons always remind me of my beloved sister, Emma, to whom this blog is dedicated, and who died on 2nd October 2014. She is sorely missed by us all.

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