Today I will give you some practical examples of how you can create a safe space for yourself every day.
But first I want to share a wee story that was prompted by a young person to whom I have been reading Harry Potter 4 or 5 nights a week since March 2020. For the right reasons this young person has been offered 2 days a week to attend their school while the current lockdown continues. During one of our conversations recently I asked if they had seen any of their friends to which the reply came, “No, but there was a P5 there, that I do know, but they aren’t in my class, so not really a friend.”
We had a chat about this and having ascertained that the other young person was likeable I suggested that perhaps getting to know each other even for a short time might be fun. I explained that sometimes people come into our lives for reasons, seasons or lifetimes. In this case the friendship might just last a season but it was better than being alone.
Later on I guddled around in Google to find the Reasons, Seasons, Lifetime poem. The original author is ‘unknown’ and this excerpt is taken from the full version:
"Some people come into your life for a Season, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a Season.”
A few unscrupulous people have tried to claim sections of the poem as their own but you can find the whole, unadulterated version here:
Over the past week I have heard from several sources how many of you are expressing just how exhausted you are, regardless of status or occupation. And it is no wonder that we are all so tired. We are constantly on the back foot, F.A.C.T. checking for sanitiser, ensuring a decent supply of masks, and of course maintaining a physical distance which fundamentally goes against the grain of our inherent need to connect. We are worn out by the daily news, the dreadful and heart breaking statistics and a deep sense of injustice that life as we knew it remains on hold.
Now more than ever it is essential that you make time for yourselves. It doesn’t have to be for long but it does have to be consistent and in order to make quality time for yourself it is important to actively connect with your senses.
Being outside is the best place to take a break and at times that can be a challenge especially if the weather is lousy, but stepping out into the fresh air can have a significant impact on your mental and physical wellbeing. Try to plan a short walk with a minimum target of 15 minutes every day regardless of weather and look around and take in your surroundings, paying attention to small details: a reflection, a starry night, the wind whistling round buildings or through trees and possibly even the sun shining. Any outside space is good regardless of where you live. Be aware of your footsteps as they hit the ground. Tune into your breathing and allow all your thoughts to escape. This walk is to be a walk for walk’s sake, not on the way to meet a friend, or do a spot of shopping. This walk must be prioritised and once you get into your stride, literally, you can extend your time to 30 mins every day which is a wee bit more than recommended by the medical profession but will do wonders for your mental and physical health.
However, if being outside is impossible or impractical, sit beside a window, or find a place where you will be undisturbed and just allow yourself to Be. Stop Doing.
Let your thoughts jumble and tumble as they will, tormenting and teasing you to take action. But remember thoughts are not actions or facts, they are just thoughts. We can have between 50,000 – 80,000 thoughts a day and 90% can be negative, so really focus on allowing all those unwanted thoughts to drift away eventually dispersing and creating clarity.
Choose what works for you whether a 10-15 minutes Chill ’n’ Still: literally standing still and allowing thoughts to disperse; Guided Meditation or a Mindfulness Exercise. Realigning your inner balance takes practice and dedication but the results are tangible.
I am a late convert to guided meditation, and here is one I used to help me focus recently:
There is a wealth of music and videos on You Tube, Spotify or your preferred provider. When you find what works for you, share with a friend to create a calmer, more connected community.
Until next time, be well.
Next Week: Small steps to positive change.
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